Spirit (daimones) wrote,

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Wtf is wrong with me.

I thought about that subject for a few moments, pondered changing it, then decided not to. It is a fairly interesting subject all of itself.

I have so much to write, and today, I think, will be a day for as much of it as I can get out. I have not slept in 24 hours...and yet my mind refuses to shut down. Circling, and circling..

So, we shall deal with my backlog first, or at least...parts of it.

I had a dream about my school in Germany, replete with secret passages and cathedral like building, peopled with monarchyites. Thyarr, Brad, Drae, Min, M, etc. It was..disturbing. I am amazed at the details my brain either created, or remembered. I as an adult have no way of verifying any of these things. I know that the secret passages, etc, are made up, because the edifices that inhabit my dreamconstructs are always such. It makes me wonder about my psyche sometimes, indeed it doth. Not only was the location a bit of a bafflement, being that I have not been to said school in, oh, 18 years?, the choice of companions...All of them, except for M and Drae, make sense. While M is a monarchy-ite, I knew her long before that place. Drae and I barely know each other, and sometimes I think to my detriment, this will always be the case. But the future is boundless, so do not take this thought as canon. (a rhyme?) The ties between the rest all make sense. So I try to figure out the emotional coupling of these people and places and fail. And I am one to tell you that all dreams mean something, even something harmless. This was far from harmless. I just wish I knew what it was trying to tell me.

A girl at work, Julie, gave me the only random eye compliment I have ever received. She said I have beautiful eyes. This has never happened to me. She wasn't trying to hit on me, she was just...stating it. As if it were a fact. This...makes me happy. It was also weird. I tried not to dwell. =) I feel so sorry for Julie. She's growing up like Sharon (the lady at the last work place whom was older than us all, but delightfully naive...) and the entire office makes fun of her...but Julie doesn't even realize it. She's so oblivious. She lives in a completely different world than the rest of us. I suppose some would envy that, but I don't.

About work: I hate my job. I hate it. Job for job I'd rather have my old one back. The only good part is the possible advancement up in the company. Mental note, they just posted a big old ad in the paper for tech workers. Apply for three of jobs, one not having any chance in getting hired at, but would love to have in end goal. Other two equally ambivalent, one requires more experience than the other. Hrm.

Which brings me to the annoyance of coding on windows. First, I was at work last night and came up with a great idea to make something at work just a step or two easier. Then realized I can't do it because there's no way to know what a map drive is mapped to on any given system. Which makes sending a link in an email to the specific file one needs annoyingly difficult. Epoo. I hate it when windows shuts down my ideas. There is probably a work around, but I don't know what it is. ;)

Another coding annoyance: I intend to have a server up over here someday. I'm slowly (read slowly) working on it. It's up, I keep it updated, try to make it do small things as I run across the need. And I thought to myself, 'eventually I want to be able to have it accessible on the outside (of my network, i.e., the internet.) I don't really need a dns for this as long as I have some reliable way of grabbing my ip. And I thought..I always have trillian up. I could, with the nifty perl toolkit extension, write a plugin that traps the yahoo has received mail.' parse it for something like, 'Gimme the server's ip bitch.' in the subject and then reply. Except then I realized another thing. There is no built in mail handler (sendmail) on windows. I'd have to use the perl to write my own. Probably. Bah. Stupid windows.

On Igors, a bar in New Orleans: "I love Igor's. You can play pool, do your laundry and get drunk at 5 in the morning." - Josh Lucas

This is a cool idea. New Orleans is really an amazing city. I just thought I'd let you all know. I want to go to Mardi Gras in the near future. Again. I WILL HAVE MY PHONEBOOTH! This was to be a link to a picture, but it looks as if lj's picture serving is being dumb. So you don't get to see the cropped photo of me with enough beads to choke a rhino, standing on a out of frame phonebooth. I'm sure this does not sadden ye. (dumb ass. LJ's photohosting is fine now. Observe! http://pics.livejournal.com/daimones/pic/0000b666)

On Oct. 28, 1886, the Statue of Liberty, a gift from the people of France, was dedicated in New York Harbor by President Cleveland. -> How come this sort of goodwill doth not happen anymore between countries. Does it?

1. Tell me something obvious about yourself.
2. Tell me something about yourself that I don't know.
3. What is your biggest fear?
4. Do you normally take the safe route or the shortcut?
5. What is the one thing you want the most that you can't buy with money?
6. What is your most treasured possession?
7. What is the one thing you hate most about yourself that you do the most often?
8. Tell me something about you sexually that I don't know.
9. Tell me something about you sexually that everybody knows.
10. What is your favorite lie to tell?
11. Name something you have done once that you can't wait to do again.
12. Are you the jealous type?
13. What is the 1 person, place or thing that you can never say no to?
14. What is the nicest thing someone has ever done for you?
15. If you could do something crazy right now, what would it be?
16. When was the last time you cried?
17. When was the last time you felt so good that nothing else mattered?
18. Do you feel comfortable in public with no shirt on?
19. Name something embarrassing you did while drunk.
20. If you post this in your journal, do you want me to answer it?

You are Windows 98.  You're a bit flaky, but well-liked.  You don't have a great memory, but everyone seems to know you.  A great person to hang out with and play some games.
Which OS are You?

You preferred Kerry's statements 78% of the time
You preferred Bush's statements 22% of the time

Voting purely on the issues you should vote Kerry

Who would you vote for if you voted on the issues?

Find out now!

"I mean, I'm from New York. You've got to be really freak to make me blush." - Bobby Cannavale

The druids were designed to take legal, non-lethal action against shoplifters, pickpockets, juve troublemakers, loiterers, buskers and mimes, but apparently their programming didn’t cover eventualities like zombies invading the place to eat the shoppers.

Now, I stole this from agnjdevil who posted it somewhere else. I thought it was beautiful (not sure it is original, though, knowing him it is. So if he hates me for posting it, well...uh...lemme know! So side by side. Latin Poetry. Huzzah!

Quoad crescant lilia, current flumina lente;
Vero sol faciet terram calidam acriter et
Illucescat luna frigidam noctem prima nigram;
Ardebo semper tui cupidus, femina.
Verte pervirides pectusque et ocellos ad hunc me,
Sub pedibus gravibus te mel Amoris oro.
As long as the lilies bloom, and the rivers gently flow;
Indeed while the sun fiercely makes the earth hot and
the early moon illuminates the black night;
I will always burn, desiring you, woman.
Turn your heart and your little green eyes towards me, this man
From under the heavy feet of Love, I beg honey-sweet you.

And speaking of beautiful. I'm going to steal a convention from puddleflood for no other reason than I want to do it. That said. I hear this song all the time. And it reminds of someone. So.

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don't mind spending every day
Out on your corner in the pouring rain, oh
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

This would suck: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=519&ncid=519&e=8&u=/ap/20041101/ap_on_re_us/painless_child I can't even imagine life like this. I had no idea. Proof that reality is weirder than fiction.

And now, because 1) I fell asleep and got sleep between the beginning and end of this post and 2) because I need to get some more sleep before the morning, I think I will have to end this here, most of what I wanted to discuss left unspoken. Hopefully it doesn't all become forgotten. I've also realized something.

If I can't ever find the time I want to write in my journal, nano is so not going to happen. And this saddens me. Because I have this -idea- in my head.

If I was working at my old job I could and did write at work. God damn.

P.S. HTML combined with text in LJ does not always work the way you want it to. You think by now I'd be comfortable with stupid quirks. But add HTML stupid quirks with LJ processing and yargh. Done editing now, I think. ;) No. Really. Seriously.
Tags: dream
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