Of course, not remembering them doesn't help anyone at all.
Where to start. I'm tired, really. I realize that for the next 3.5 months, I'm going to be tired. Between school and work and trying to at least pretend that I have other things in my life, sleep often gets demoted or ignored. As does food. I'm hungry. But I'll survive that. The question is, will I survive school. You see, I really want to graduate with the best possible grades I can get, and now that I can safely say I've been through the 'norm' of what my classes will be (extrapolation based upon years of knowledge of classes and professors) I realize something. I'm really just not into this whole 'school' thing. It hasn't yet hit me that I have classes. and that beyond reading, these require homework. I keep thinking I should be a better student and not just coast in on autopilot. Even with that, I can still probably get A's. But I've realized something. My retention level sucks. ;) Even if I'm interested in the topic, if I don't make an effort, I can't retain it in its essence. The knowledge perhaps is there, but as anyone whose ever done any psychological study, that's not the same thing. I want that essence, that spark. That distinguishing mark between knowledge, the scope of understanding, and usefulness, the art of application. And even that sentence doesn't fully credit what I want. Maybe I'm making the idea of knowledge into something grand, the idea of graduation into something more impressive...but I have this vision of usefulness in my life. Some grand scheme that I will mark the world with my life's path. And I don't mean the mark I leave on my friends, impressive and as relevant as that is to my goals in life. I want the things that I study, the understandings that I take away from them to lead to something better. A change. So that after I've realized it, then what I've found can be passed on. Maybe that's what I want. A form of immortality in that the knowledge I pioneer and synthesize will not be lost when I depart this realm. See how tired I am? :)
For the record: Classes to pass before I get a piece of paper stating I have a BS in Computer Science (applicable, don't you think?) and have spent circa 60k on my education are as follows:
Theories of Personality - Taught by lovely Dr. Kent, a psychologist, therapist, minister (something to do with a congregation in a theological aspect, at any rate :), theology...very interesting person. Very interesting class. Not sure exactly what to expect for 'tests', but I will enjoy the class. My problem is that I think I would be much more likely to openly debate, discuss, etc, with him were the class not as full of, well, business students. Call it a hunch, but going into the ramifications of unified theories of mathematics as they apply to the genetic computer of reality and hence our personalities, giving personality a scientific casual effect much like weather (a phenomenon that does have variables that lead to predicable outcomes, just with so many variables that it becomes chaotic theory and math...) is probably beyond them. I could be typing though. Not the teacher though. He's a smurt cookie. If he could just lose the, 'I've preached so my voice modulates so and I tend to be louder than I need do' voice...I mean, voice modulation and control is nice, but sheez.
Web Design - Tom Brownridge, teacher I'd like to call friend. I'll learn how to design web sites. Go me. Things I to some degree already know. HTML, XHTML, CSS, PHP, SQL, etc. But I'll hopefully learn new ways to combine them. Shouldn't be too bad. Maybe I can make my pet work project my class project (if we do one) and hence kill two birds, one stone. :) In an aside, some of this has a direct relation to the pages I use on LJ. I too could make a sweet style. A sidenote for those interested in my divination into the component style and hence my examination of s2. Not being able to see the code and know how things work in component is pissing me off. On the other hand, the idea of being able to add components...that I can do. That's wonderful. I get how to do that with component. If I could but think of something I really wanted to add...but actually editing things in the journal, say, adding the journal subject to the date bar above each entry rather than giving it a delineation above the entry...or putting the metadata where I want it, rather than where it is...You'd think you'd just call the Entry::print_metadata() function....to test this, I over rode the default just to see..nothing happened. Apparently component doesn't use this function! Grr, so it probably does it manually. Or it might not, and I'm missing something. Or it has its own class hierarchy and overrides, etc. Annoyance. Pure and simple! And there's more function strangeness... Ah well. And you wonder why I don't spend time doing homework. Or writing a simple character background. Speaking of. I read something that struck home. And another something. I may not know her, but just by website alone she strikes me as someone worth getting to know. And she seems pretty cool besides. ;)
Windows Networking - Julie Mansfield, whom I don't really know well enough to say anything cool about her. She's helpful though! The class name kinda speaks for itself, taught in true cisco numbing style. For those of you lucky enough to not know what this means, this means GOBS of labwork. Ugh. I will survive though. It's windows networking. How complicated could it be. (don't hurt me. ;) I'll probably learn lots of things I didn't already know. There's always room to improve on my networking skills, specially the server side of it. Various things like thin net clients, dns, mailservers, etc. Even web servers on the windows side. Only ever worked with apache before. Don't know how inclusive the course will be, but aside from much bitching about labwork necessary to pound stuff in head...
System Design and Analysis - Robert (Bob) Fontaine, who has a nervous twitch in his eye that makes me want to rip it out. The course is a IS course, not a CS course, so it has a business slant to it. It feels like I'm taking software engineering all over again. Wee! Assuming I can keep up with his haphazard way of assigning things, I should be okay.
Oh, and the new 'education' software that the school is using, Blackboard? Ickypoo. It's going to annoy me all semester to have to check *it* for my assignment stuff. Or I may get used to it. As you might imagine, all my more technologically inclined professors are using it, so, I'll get mileage from it. There are times I hate being a CS major. ;)
http://www.hootisland.com/stuff/victorian.html - This kept me amused for hours. Or at least a few minutes of good belly laughter.
I wasn't that drunk.
Can't buy love, but the rest is negotiable...
Really, it's not fair that they can make pretty pictures that mean so neat (random!) things.
Okay. So I marshaled my thoughts, and I'm still of the opinion that I'm not discussing that which I wanted to discuss. Oh, a sidenote. Don't change your styles. You lose your settings on the old ones. It sucked. ;) Of course, if I'd been smart and made a new style, then changed which one my journal used....but *no*. You think I'm that smart? I really hope I can design sites that have as engaging of content, with as much power. Anyways.
Lack of sleep is causing strange dreams. Today I dreamed that the world was in post-apocalyptic state...and that Bri was a princess, nykkit was a..I 'unno. Corrupt advisor, I guess? And I was Bri's driver. Bri was somehow important to the aliens that were going to uplift humanity into a new era, which is why she was a princess. She was sublimely unaware of the efforts that humanity was going to protect her from being sullied and hence not important to the aliens...she had been brought up knowing/being taught/believing...unaware of the dangers. I was the protector. I wasn't just the driver. I was a bodyguard. nykitt..well..she was on the aliens payroll, I guess. She was just shifty. Sorry. ;) It was a weird dream.
Been RP'ing more lately. An entry all to that will someday grace these diaries pages, but...it's a sensitive subject. :)
I wanted to talk about more stuff, but as I've said, I'm all out of stuff. Lucidity, calories...call it what you will, but I'm going to go.