November 2nd, 2004


Wtf is wrong with me.

I thought about that subject for a few moments, pondered changing it, then decided not to. It is a fairly interesting subject all of itself.

I have so much to write, and today, I think, will be a day for as much of it as I can get out. I have not slept in 24 hours...and yet my mind refuses to shut down. Circling, and circling..

So, we shall deal with my backlog first, or at of it.

I had a dream about my school in Germany, replete with secret passages and cathedral like building, peopled with monarchyites. Thyarr, Brad, Drae, Min, M, etc. It was..disturbing. I am amazed at the details my brain either created, or remembered. I as an adult have no way of verifying any of these things. I know that the secret passages, etc, are made up, because the edifices that inhabit my dreamconstructs are always such. It makes me wonder about my psyche sometimes, indeed it doth. Not only was the location a bit of a bafflement, being that I have not been to said school in, oh, 18 years?, the choice of companions...All of them, except for M and Drae, make sense. While M is a monarchy-ite, I knew her long before that place. Drae and I barely know each other, and sometimes I think to my detriment, this will always be the case. But the future is boundless, so do not take this thought as canon. (a rhyme?) The ties between the rest all make sense. So I try to figure out the emotional coupling of these people and places and fail. And I am one to tell you that all dreams mean something, even something harmless. This was far from harmless. I just wish I knew what it was trying to tell me.

A girl at work, Julie, gave me the only random eye compliment I have ever received. She said I have beautiful eyes. This has never happened to me. She wasn't trying to hit on me, she was just...stating it. As if it were a fact. This...makes me happy. It was also weird. I tried not to dwell. =) I feel so sorry for Julie. She's growing up like Sharon (the lady at the last work place whom was older than us all, but delightfully naive...) and the entire office makes fun of her...but Julie doesn't even realize it. She's so oblivious. She lives in a completely different world than the rest of us. I suppose some would envy that, but I don't.

About work: I hate my job. I hate it. Job for job I'd rather have my old one back. The only good part is the possible advancement up in the company. Mental note, they just posted a big old ad in the paper for tech workers. Apply for three of jobs, one not having any chance in getting hired at, but would love to have in end goal. Other two equally ambivalent, one requires more experience than the other. Hrm.

Which brings me to the annoyance of coding on windows. First, I was at work last night and came up with a great idea to make something at work just a step or two easier. Then realized I can't do it because there's no way to know what a map drive is mapped to on any given system. Which makes sending a link in an email to the specific file one needs annoyingly difficult. Epoo. I hate it when windows shuts down my ideas. There is probably a work around, but I don't know what it is. ;)

Another coding annoyance: I intend to have a server up over here someday. I'm slowly (read slowly) working on it. It's up, I keep it updated, try to make it do small things as I run across the need. And I thought to myself, 'eventually I want to be able to have it accessible on the outside (of my network, i.e., the internet.) I don't really need a dns for this as long as I have some reliable way of grabbing my ip. And I thought..I always have trillian up. I could, with the nifty perl toolkit extension, write a plugin that traps the yahoo has received mail.' parse it for something like, 'Gimme the server's ip bitch.' in the subject and then reply. Except then I realized another thing. There is no built in mail handler (sendmail) on windows. I'd have to use the perl to write my own. Probably. Bah. Stupid windows.

On Igors, a bar in New Orleans: "I love Igor's. You can play pool, do your laundry and get drunk at 5 in the morning." - Josh Lucas

This is a cool idea. New Orleans is really an amazing city. I just thought I'd let you all know. I want to go to Mardi Gras in the near future. Again. I WILL HAVE MY PHONEBOOTH! This was to be a link to a picture, but it looks as if lj's picture serving is being dumb. So you don't get to see the cropped photo of me with enough beads to choke a rhino, standing on a out of frame phonebooth. I'm sure this does not sadden ye. (dumb ass. LJ's photohosting is fine now. Observe!

On Oct. 28, 1886, the Statue of Liberty, a gift from the people of France, was dedicated in New York Harbor by President Cleveland. -> How come this sort of goodwill doth not happen anymore between countries. Does it?

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Now, I stole this from agnjdevil who posted it somewhere else. I thought it was beautiful (not sure it is original, though, knowing him it is. So if he hates me for posting it, well...uh...lemme know! So side by side. Latin Poetry. Huzzah!

Quoad crescant lilia, current flumina lente;
Vero sol faciet terram calidam acriter et
Illucescat luna frigidam noctem prima nigram;
Ardebo semper tui cupidus, femina.
Verte pervirides pectusque et ocellos ad hunc me,
Sub pedibus gravibus te mel Amoris oro.
As long as the lilies bloom, and the rivers gently flow;
Indeed while the sun fiercely makes the earth hot and
the early moon illuminates the black night;
I will always burn, desiring you, woman.
Turn your heart and your little green eyes towards me, this man
From under the heavy feet of Love, I beg honey-sweet you.

And speaking of beautiful. I'm going to steal a convention from puddleflood for no other reason than I want to do it. That said. I hear this song all the time. And it reminds of someone. So.

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This would suck: I can't even imagine life like this. I had no idea. Proof that reality is weirder than fiction.

And now, because 1) I fell asleep and got sleep between the beginning and end of this post and 2) because I need to get some more sleep before the morning, I think I will have to end this here, most of what I wanted to discuss left unspoken. Hopefully it doesn't all become forgotten. I've also realized something.

If I can't ever find the time I want to write in my journal, nano is so not going to happen. And this saddens me. Because I have this -idea- in my head.

If I was working at my old job I could and did write at work. God damn.

P.S. HTML combined with text in LJ does not always work the way you want it to. You think by now I'd be comfortable with stupid quirks. But add HTML stupid quirks with LJ processing and yargh. Done editing now, I think. ;) No. Really. Seriously.
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